Thursday.

      I texted W4 at around noon and asked if she was doing anything tonight. She replied back almost instantly with uncertainty because she wasn't sure if she had to work later that night. I asked her to tell me ASAP when she hears confirmation because I would be done with things on my end and be at her front steps by 8:30 PM. By 7 and still with no message back I decided to take Nhat and John's offer to eat after 8:00 instead. While I was enjoying this epic bowl of egg noodles and pig brain soup, I get a text at 8:30 asking me when I was going to come. I had no choice but to tell her that I was busy with my friends and that I could be there by 10:00. She sounded disappointed and I told her that I'll try my best. Suddenly she told me not to worry about it because her little sister was coming home and they would go to dinner together. I said cool and hung up the phone and went down the street to eat some Baskin Robbins. I'm going to get fat.
      Some time after she texted me asking if I wanted to come eat dinner with her sister and her boyfriend. I agreed and she handed the phone to a typical Vietnamese male local's voice, which sounded mightily sloppy. He shouted some directions at me and all I could get was the name of the street. I had to in turn yell at John so he would help me remember it. John and Nhat wanted to go meet this sister of hers and I wanted to bring along two tall looking tough guys if a fight was to happen. I told W4 that my friends and I were already full and that we wouldn't be eating.
        Eventually we made it there without much problems despite it being all the way in District 11. Why the hell would they go eat goat meat in District 11 when Trung Son is technically a lot closer to District 1? By the time we got there the three of them were the last ones eating. There was already an order of goat meat being self grilled and W4 looked amazing in this black and white blouse. I reached over to greet the sister's boyfriend with a handshake and he barely opened his hand and once he did he did not grip back. It went limp and I was like WTF?! I know some of you think it's a western thing to grip, but I've shaken hands with enough people in Vietnam to know that plenty of them do grip back. This guy looked young and like a typical Vietnamese male in shorts and sandals. I couldn't select him from a lineup if I tried.
        Fortunately, we appeared to get a long well. He tried to listen in on the English being spoken by Nhat and John and when W4 asked him if he understood he nodded as if he actually did. It was kind of funny to talk to him because it reminded me why I have nothing in common with the local men here. I was trying my best to be polite and interested. He began almost immediately telling me that Vietnam is messed up and that living here forever is too chaotic. Oh no! not another typical self hating local!! Then he asked me if pho in America was 20 dollars and if we only ate filet meat. I smiled and had to pinch myself from laughing out loud. Yes, despite our three years difference in life, I could tell we were more like ten or so years apart in many other aspects of life. Then he went on and made it seem like only Vietnam ate balut eggs when W4 brought up the fact that I can eat balut eggs but not bamboo shoots. We laughed a little bit and I felt like I wanted to get the hell out of there ASAP.
        When it was time to pay the bill came out and there was an awkward moment of silence as the sister and boyfriend looked at me. I stared the other day and whipped out my wallet and offered 100,000 because my friends and I ordered three sodas worth a total of 30,000. I basically threw away 60,000 Dong for no reason. In this brief moment I hope they weren't expecting me to pay. Their meal came out to be almost 500,000 Dong, which is rather expensive for a typical student to dine on on a normal basis. When asked if they eat out late nights often the sister chirped back they they always do. Finally, the boyfriend reluctantly paid by getting money out of the trunk of his motorbike. He's probably not rich judging from his bike and I'm not either judging by how I wasn't stupid because I didn't pay for a meal that I was invited to. Afterwards things were rather awkward as the sister was in a hurry to go home. I had ask Phuong to hang out with me a little bit afterwards and she agreed to. She went off with her sister and the boyfriend near their bikes and said something and they didn't look really happy about something. I later found out that it wasn't about the money, it was about how W4 was worried that her sister and the boyfriend might consider her "slutty" or "easy" for going out with three guys so late at night like that.
         We visited Monica Massage where despite all the motorbikes in the front, there were only a few patrons around. We opted for the foot massage instead of the full body massage because most legit massage places would be closed at this hour of the night. Since there wasn't a dressing room for women I was happy that she was wearing shorts. I quickly got changed and sat next to her in a room and John and Nhat came about fifteen minutes later. They're into saunas. I'm not. It was clearly her first time at a place like this and she was really inquisitive about the procedure and practice. At first she only wanted the foot and then things went up a little bit more. I tried my best not to pop a boner as she laid sprawled out next to me on her stomach with her ass in the air being massaged because I was getting a massage by a man (they ran out of workers) and that would have been very awkward. I think I had one anyways.
       About two hours later we bid each other adieu and went our way. It was fun to see her, but it was tough to balance two languages at the same time. Even though John and Nhat both understand Vietnamese, our mother language is still English. We sometimes feel very uncomfortable speaking Vietnamese to teach other because of reasons I've already explained a billion times. So after all of it and blowing 25 dollars (for two) for a foot massage I didn't even get a happy ending I think W4 and my story will conclude happily if I just call it quits with her right now. But remember exactly what blog you're reading. Let's continue this just for the drama!

A special thanks to Kimberlyn and Jacob for their recent generosity.
Click here to feed me.